my first million words...

so, i am an avid journal writer. the problem is i haven't been avid lately.

my journal writing started when i was in high school. i went to a Giants games at the Stick'. it was a typical Candlestick park summer evening... freezing cold. While i was there some guy (who was obviously a BIT inebriated!) was yelling and screaming at the other team. He wasn't just yelling, he was going nuts. We were all laughing as he taunted the left fielder mercilessly. Suddenly he started yelling "you want a piece of me?" (he still had zero reaction from the player) and took his shirt off. Now, i will say that i was dressed in my puffy 49ers jacket, jeans, and a beanie hat and i was STILL FREEZING, so the sight of this guy undressing was almost too much. We were laughing so hard it hurt....

when i got home and laid in bed that night i thought to myself "it's a shame that i'll forget all about this in a couple of days. This was such a great night!". Then, suddenly, a lesson from Church came back to me about journals. I could preserve my history, including this most important story of the half-naked drunk guy at Candlestick! AWESOME!

I started with a notebook, writing random notes on it about things that were going on. One day my good friend Angelique found my notebook and asked about it. Though a bit embarrassed, i explained all about it to her. I graduated from high school a few weeks later. I received one present, a brand-new, bound journal from Angelique.

I started writing in it regularly. At the time I was still laboring under the delusion that, sitting in my grandpa rocking chair 40 years from now, i would want to read about what i had for dinner, what girls i had spoken with on the phone, and what movies i wanted to see.

Now, i am NOT a journal snob. I think that writing anything in a journal is better than not writing. However, as i went along writing i came to find it much more satisfying to try to understand the world around me in my journal. That may sound a bit pretentious, since even a lunatic understands the world around him in his own way, but it worked for me. In short, i don't use my journal as a verbatim recital of my daily activities anymore. It is SO much more to me...

My journal writing has evolved many times over the years. I hit my journal writing stride while serving as a missionary in Chile. I could have filled 100 journals with all the amazing, wonderful, and strange things happening each day. As it stands i filled about 5.

WAIT! as i am wont to do, i am going into a tangential conversation. i will hit the brakes right... NOW!

the point is... i hardly ever get the chance to write in my journal anymore. plus, when i do my hand writes too slow to get it all down in time before i'm called away to some errand..

so i am trying the blog format. I know it's not as private, but my thoughts are never private anyways, since i have such a big mouth.

i figure that it will take me a million words, at the very least, written to become a good writer. i'm going to work on it here first. sorry to put you through this....